A while back, I wrote about being sick of not feeling good enough. I could go into lengths about the reasons why I never feel good enough. Just look up child psychology and understanding attachment trauma to give you some ideas. But, what I’m really sick of is the fact that, whilst a lot of these thoughts of not feeling ‘good enough’ seem to be a strongly female problem, the fact is men get it too.
Men have feelings. Men hurt. Men love. Men are human too. We need to stop treating them like they aren’t. I know so many women who will openly talk about not feeling loved or not feeling ‘good enough’. Yet, men aren’t known for speaking so much about their feelings. And the truth is, they likely won’t speak up, but they do have them. They care. They want to feel loved and they want to feel ‘good enough’ too.
The more I look into the issues that cause psychological trouble for adults, the more I see in people around me how much they hurt, suffer and try to get by on their own. No one should ever feel like they have to get by alone. There’s support around. Whilst women are great at talking to others about what we’re going through, most men I know will suffer in silence. They won’t talk about what’s going on because “that’s not what men do”.
I’m grateful that we are in a time when mental health issues are becoming more normal to be discussed. That there’s less of a stigma around speaking about such issues. We are one step closer to everyone being more able to talk about what’s going on with them and seeking the help and support that they need. We are becoming more aware of what people need and how they can be best supported. I think it’s great.
What does bug me, though, is the gender-biased discussions I do still hear. There’s a lot of talk of how women suffer or what women go through. I think the key thing is that we need to remember that all people suffer. All people have feelings. All people need love, to be loved and to give love. All people need support. Yes, women will more likely tell you what they need. Men won’t necessarily. But it doesn’t mean they don’t need it.
I think a lot of the awareness around what’s going on for each person comes with age and courage to understand and explore themselves in a deep way. It’s not an easy task to undertake, knowing why you are how you are. And, what you can do to be the best you. Ultimately, we are all good enough. We need to find within ourselves to believe it completely and be confident in ourselves. To trust ourselves that we have our own backs. That we are worthy of love.
The simplest answer to life is just that, keep it simple. We tend to overcomplicate things when in reality, we just need to take a step back. Breathe. Remind ourselves that we are good enough and are deserving of love. Everyone, male and female, is going through something and is deserving of love. Please help spread more love, and less hate. It’s that simple. Make others feel valued and while you’re at it, remind yourself: You are good enough.
Let me hear you say it: I AM GOOD ENOUGH!
Repeat: I AM GOOD ENOUGH! <3