How I went from ‘giving up’ to finding my purpose.

It’s an incredibly amazing feeling, knowing exactly what you want and how to get it. Having goals and a purpose to your life, giving you reason to get up each and every day is amazing!

When you don’t have goals or purpose, life can be overwhelming. Sometimes, it can seem pointless. It’s like you don’t even know what the point is in going on. This was me a few years ago. I struggled to get up every day. The reasons that had got me up before no longer mattered so much. I found it hard to find positives. I felt like my life had no purpose.

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t depressed. I was still happy each day but I felt like I needed more… I needed a purpose.

So how did I get out of this slump? How did I get to where I am now?

First, I started with myself. I started by being real, blunt and honest with myself about everything. What I did well, what I was doing wrong, and what did I really want. I read books, including those self-help books that people usually laugh at in television & movies. Well, don’t laugh. I highly recommend reading them. Especially if you’re a little lost, too.

During one of my worst days, I walked into a book store. I went to the self-help section & let my heart guide me. That’s where I grabbed Sheryl Sandberg‘s book: Lean In. It was exactly what I needed to read at the time. A completely blunt and honest book from a successful woman who was living the life I wanted for myself. In reading her advice on everything from juggling career & maternity to putting yourself out there professionally as a woman, I learned I needed to be a lot more honest with myself about what was holding me back. No one else was holding me back but me.

After being real with myself, I started seeking guidance from others. I talked to everyone. Friends, family, colleagues, managers, and my wider business network. I reached out to people I didn’t know too well, and people who knew me best. I would ask them questions about future, past, career aspirations, how they got to where they are and so on. I wanted to know what they liked most about what brought them to where they were. And what they didn’t like about their experiences to date. I learned a lot about a lot of people.

What I also learned was that they were very willing to talk about themselves, and they were quick to give advice and suggestions on what they thought I should do. I took their advice. I made notes. I compiled my thoughts regularly and would brainstorm what stood out and spoke to me the best. I noted down what made my heart jump. And what made my skin crawl. If I really didn’t like it, I crossed it off. “Thanks but no thanks. That’s not for me”. After a while of drawing all over my daily journal with all sorts of colourful brainstorm designs, there began to be some recurring themes.

Putting those themes together, I discovered I had an ideal dream job. I had no idea what the job title was. I didn’t know if it were possible. Or if it even existed as a job yet. But, I started to think about what I could do now to try working towards that dream job. I wasn’t happy where I was at so, I might as well be working towards what I want to do.

I started to break down the qualities I needed to work on and what experience I needed to make this dream a reality. I was brutally honest with myself about my weaknesses. I noted down what I needed to improve on to be truly effective in this dream job. I’m a long way off this dream job but, now that I have a picture in my mind of what I want to achieve, I feel like I have a clear direction for where I’m headed and how to get there. 

Each day, I continue to work away at getting that little bit closer to making my dream a reality. I work on improving my weaknesses, gaining valuable experience and qualifications, and one thing each day to get that little bit closer. I’ve shared my dreams with a few people because having close people to share and support you on your vision helps. It’s great to have supportive friends tell you you’re not crazy. That you can achieve your dreams. Having their support, and knowing clearly what I want to achieve, I am more driven and determined than I’ve ever been. My life has purpose and a direction. And it feels great.

If I can do anything to help anybody else realise their dreams, or even to achieve them, that would be amazing. Tell me, what’s your purpose? What drives you? Or are you like old me and currently lost for direction? If you need help, please reach out. I’m more than happy to help! 🙂

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