I’m not changing for anyone!

Get out of here with your opinion. It’s unwelcome and was never asked for.

Too many times, people share with you how they think you should do something. How you should look a certain way, act a certain way or even think a certain way. Do you know why I’m not acting the way you want me to? It’s because that’s not who I am.

I think you are great the way you are. You have your own experiences, beliefs, likes, dreams, hopes, fears, desires etc. Each and every one of those is fantastic and unique, just like you are. I would never want you to change. Well, maybe just change that annoying chewing habit but other than that, I think you’re awesome the way you are.

So why can’t you accept me as I am? Why can’t you do me the same justice? Do you understand what you’re asking of me? You are asking me to change what comes naturally. You are asking me to change how I think, feel, act, believe. To change all of that, I might as well be someone else completely. If you want somebody else, go find that person. I’m not changing.

Short and sweet this week but, it is what it is. You simply cannot ask someone to change just because YOU don’t like them. They’re being who they are. If you don’t like that, you need to think why you don’t like them so much. Is it them, or is it that it means you might have to change how you think, and that would be too much to ask?

You might be thinking, ‘I like them, I just think they should do x or y’. I get ya… I do. But, if you’ve provided them suggestions or feedback and they’ve said no. Then let them be. It’s their life. They don’t have to do what you suggested just cos you said it’s a great idea. You don’t know everything they’re going through, have been through or what they’re hoping to achieve. You aren’t them. They, and they only, are responsible for the decisions they make so let them be. Step back and let them be themselves.

This can be applied to anything. From things as simple as people telling me what to write in my blogs or how I should go about achieving what I want. To things like people telling my partner and I we should be married with 5 children by now… Not mathematically possible hahaa but that aside, people are never far from offering their opinion or suggestions on how you should live, act, think or feel. None of which is actually any of their business. Nor are they responsible for the outcomes of choices made.

If I changed my blog and wrote what others wanted, it wouldn’t feel natural. It wouldn’t feel right and it certainly wouldn’t be me. I’m running this site how I want. I’m grateful that the amazing talented women who also contribute to this site are equally supportive and encouraging to be ourselves. We write what we want and speak our own truths.

I encourage you, if you feel like someone is pushing you to change or to be something other than yourself, push back. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you should be anything other than yourself. You can do this politely if you’re like myself and don’t like to hurt people. Just say, “hey, thank you for the suggestion but I’m going to go ahead with my idea.” Of course, that’s dependant on the situation. If someone is telling you how to dress or look, perhaps it could be worded, “thank you for your opinion but I like my look and I’m going to wear this”.

If you’re a blunt personality, then go forth and stand your ground! Much respect to you. I most certainly am not going to tell you how to respond. I’ll simply share what I would do and it’s up to you if that would work for you. Be kind, be nice, be genuine and just be you.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

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