What were you thinking

Regardless of if you have an interest in the Royal family or not, the whole world was watching when the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge walked out those doors of the Lindo Wing at St Mary’s Hospital with beaming smiles on their faces. Kate appeared beautifully dressed, makeup on, hair done, and even wearing heels. However, there has since been a media storm over Kate’s appearance and what she was wearing.

 

I have to ask myself a few questions on this… Is this respectful? Is this responsible? Is this right?

 

Anyone who has gone through childbirth knows just how taxing it can be. Regardless of how you gave birth, C-section, natural, with or without pain medication… no matter how your child came into this world, it is not easy. The last thing that any new Mumma needs is anyone, let alone the world, criticising you. And to be honest, she was really open to criticism no matter how she appeared, or even if she chose not to appear. If she was in comfy clothes and no makeup, people would have said she didn’t even bother to make an effort. If she chose not to make an appearance, people would have said she doesn’t care about the people. No matter what she did and how she looked, it seems that there are people ready to tear her down. Why?

The questions have been asked by the media whether Kate’s appearance places unrealistic ridiculous pressure on new mothers to appear the same after they give birth.

 

I’m sorry, but what part of Kate being willing to please the crowd (not only in person, but worldwide also) with a brief (and I do mean brief) appearance with the new Prince so that the world can celebrate with them, grounds for criticising her for how she looks and what she is wearing?

 

Not only does Kate have makeup artists, hair stylists, and anyone else that may be required at her disposal to enable her to look this way, but she likely changed right back into some comfortable clothes just like anyone else the second she got home. Besides, who wouldn’t want to take advantage of the pampering while snuggling their newborn if it meant that the photos and video footage that will be shared worldwide would have you feeling good rather than criticised for not making an effort???

 

So no, I don’t think it is respectful to criticise someone, let alone a new Mumma for their appearance, I don’t think it is responsible and I don’t think it is right.

 

We need to lift each other up not tear each other down. Stop beating women up! If it’s not because they aren’t “making an effort” it’s because they “made an effort”…. great logic!

 

I don’t know about you, but what I was thinking when I saw those images were “awww cute!!!!” quickly followed by “she looks so happy and in love with her new son” and “I wonder what they will name him”

 

I do admit that I noticed her appearance. I’m sure everyone did, and had their own flashback to how they looked in the first 24 hours after giving birth (There have been enough articles and memes going around for me to be pretty certain of this fact) but you know what? Under everything, she is just like the rest of us. Sure, she may have access to makeup artists, hairstylists, nurses and help that others don’t, but under it all she is just a woman who fell in love and had a family with the man she loves. She just happens to have married into Royalty and has the world watching her every move. I admire her for being willing to please the world with those first glimpses of the new Prince and you know what, she looked amazing while doing so. Not once did I think she placed unwanted pressure on me to appear the same way.

 

So, for anyone posting photos of themselves after giving birth with captions like “This is what a real mother looks like after giving birth!” (I have seen many!), have a think about what you are saying. You’re implying that Kate isn’t a real mother, you’re implying that the only possible way for any new Mumma anywhere in the world to look is just how you looked.

Actually, you should be posting with a caption somewhere along the lines of “This is my experience of birth” or “This is ME after giving birth”. Don’t put expectations of your experience on everyone else as if that is the only way to be. Because we all know that childbirth can go many ways and parenthood can go many ways!

By all means, share your experiences. But they are just that, YOUR experiences! They are not the only experience in the world nor the experience of everyone else so it is not fair to tear other women down in the process.

 

So, I leave you with this. Here is my picture after giving birth. It’s not everyone’s experience, but this is me and our son shortly after he arrived (before we had mastered the wrapping technique!)

And here are some after we were at home and all his newborn puffiness had gone away.

 

Until next time friends,

Erin xx

 

 

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